All you have is you

You are your own defender

Let me tell you where I am, briefly....as I have work to do. Freelancing and trying to work up a body of work at the same time. What does that mean? That means switching gears, painting what someone wants back to my own "personal" work. The works on canvases. The works I'm trying to amass to have a show someday in a gallery that I fit in. This is hard. Damn hard. When the work for others slows down, so does the rent money and it's not easy to paint your personal work when the rent money isn't there. Am I looking for some part time work? Yes I am.

Today my dentist took his last bite out of my funds, leaving me with a whopping $500 left to my name in life. I'm not going to get all depressed about it. I've been down to $7 and had angels save me in the nick of time. I know how to hustle. I have to be my own defender, salesperson and I have to also get in there and do the work too. Drained? Hell yes. I don't know if working a fulltime job is as draining as all this switching gears and hustling. It's hard work. Then you're cold calling, knocking on doors and getting no responses. You're trying be an "emerging artist" but no one's letting you out of the cocoon. It feels like that, frustrating but you know what kid? You just keep on keeping on. Work. Work. Work. Don't let it get you down. You have something inside all your own. Something is going to come out of all this knocking and work. I got a response back from a gallery I've been wanting to get my work into, it wasn't a promise of anything but it was a response saying they were impressed with my work and maybe, maybe, something, some time. That is so much better than NOTHING. That is enough for a hungry bird to have hope and keep on flying.

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Words!

Hello! I haven't blogged since last year. Even writing the word "blog" felt foreign and weird! I have actually been writing stuff on my Patreon account so if you've missed the updates you can sign up for free over there. There is also an option to pay a few dollars a month to help support me as an artist and get "extra" content- in case you are of that mindset and either way- thank you for caring about the art adventures. I have missed blogging actually. I guess I like to make words, string them together like a pretty necklace and let them live their own expressive life wrapped around me. Times are different. Times are weird! But I guess you know that. And also times are the same and as old as time. Is it really more terrible than any other time or are we humans just more "connected" to the propaganda and daily bad trip in a way that is insane and unhealthy? Either way I do my best to keep my sanity and I don't believe about 98% of what I s...

Taming the monster

What started as me deciding to spend 30 minutes picking out clothes to donate from my closet .. Turned into about 2 hours of folding t shirts, jeans and deciding winter was far enough away that all sweaters and coats could be packed away. My closet was a walk-in diaster. My cat had lived in it all winter, knocked stuff down, slept on it, fuzzed up clothes and built forts. No lie. I had been living in the same two pairs of jeans and 5 shirts off my bedroom floor (closet #2 😂). First things first, all the T shirts from OLD JOBS were the first to get put in donation pile. I don't need memories of "that place" and they were all too small, waaay too large or tan/beige/grey ..all the wrong unhappy colors that just say JOB when you look at them. Bye! So that happened yesterday. Major project that still needs work but for now it is peaceful enough to my brain to leave it alone. I have two large loads of laundry to do because my clothes look like...well like a cat has been sleep...

Digital Vacation

Have you looked around and discovered you have filled your life with bad habits? If you said NO- good for you, you might not be human! 😁 I was experiencing a major BLAH and it was all because of ME. What I spent time on, consumed, did and did not do. I also felt like the willpower I used to have in abundance was gone and I wondered if I would ever get it back. First and foremost I had to look at my main bad habits. What was the very first thing I did every day. EVERY DAY! I reached for my phone, I social media blitzed my brain over two long cups of coffee every morning. I made sure to look at my MEMORIES like it was my job every day. Ruminating on the past and seeing everyone's angry opinions and celebrity/political posts and regurgitated memes ad nauseum....is actually not a very optimistic and healthy way for me to cruise into the day. Not only is this not good for my spirit it wasted almost two hours of every morning. 💀 That's precious time! I'm weaning mys...

Art Plunge

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