This is how I feel, like my body is no longer my home. It has been ransacked by intruders and a fire has been set to it. I don't feel safe in my own body anymore and even worse... I FEAR it. Every month, it is put through hellish torture and the aftermath is me trying to rebuild, my digestive system, my reproductive system, my general health and energy and my back.... Laying in bed for days puking does a number on an already injured spine. Finding time and the positivity I need to exercise and work, it's a struggle. If this is endo it also affects your immune system and food become enemies as well. So here I am, back to what I call Day 1 of rebuilding. Cooking food I can eat, kicking out what I can't eat (sugar, wheat, gluten, dairy, red meat, anything processed, refined, etc) and trying to get some light exercise to get oxygen to my hurt back. I could complain but it's pointless, today I'm thankful I can drink water and eat a banana. Enjoy your health!
Well it's official. I am addicted. Luckily to nothing horrible. It was bound to happen. I'm addicted to the morning walk...the endorphins...the serotonin...the "me" time....the solitude....the music pumping in my ears...the nature I see and feeling like I control my day. I'm usually up before the sun and getting as much mileage as my body allows. Sometimes it's more than others but it's always good. I'm going to add in more sprints here and there as "burst" exercises are better for me than long running sessions. Yes, even on the weekends I'm out doing it. There is no sleeping in and admittedly I woke up at 2:30am and started having my morning coffee in preparation... Even though I will wait till much later to go out. That's how I know it's an addiction. Currently on Week 6 and haven't missed a workout or even postponed it. I showed up for myself and made myself a priority every morning. I am proud of that and so much LESS...
I hope you find a solution to this nightmare. It's hard work but worth the sacrifice. Health is wealth.
ReplyDeleteI'm doing all I can possibly do, it's been years of researching possible diagnosis, treatments, trying this and trying that. Dealing with more doctors and er rooms than anyone should in a lifetime.
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