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Returning to Reality


Today's blog is just a general brain dump of things. I've been noticing of late a sense of contentment for leaving behind a life that made me suffer a lot.
For instance-before the pandemic I was focused on building up my Instagram followers, reading blogs and websites from art coaches on how to market, keep your followers entertained with fresh content, videos, etc, etc .. The list is extensive, boring and made my spirit hurt. My spirit just wants to paint. My spirit doesn't want to put on a full face of makeup and parade around on cutesy edited videos that entertain people online who are "bored-scrolling"on their phone. Fun, short, art videos YES but anything beyond that... NO.
After pandemic hit and my own health crisis-I picked up my old friend "mindfulness" and the zen leanings that got me through so much strife in life.
Like magic I ceased climbing up that pointless ladder of followers, feeling the need to stay on Facebook, striving to enter the competitive "art world", making a name for myself and blah blah blah. I simply turned the channel and tuned into my heart. PURE CONTENTMENT. No longer relying on an outside source to approve of me. No more pointless things that take up my mind space and time. I can now get down to LIFE at it's very essence and creating art-the whole point of what I'm about.
I stopped thinking I needed to get into galleries to be validated or playing the game of importance... thinking other people had control of my  career or future. It's me baby, all me. Over here doing it my way and doing what fulfills me. Simple. Mindfulness got me here. I am unstressed at last. I stopped running.

(Restoration project from my part time job)
Now I split my time between artist and artisan. My part time work is as an artisan restoring, decorative painting, gilding,etc. Check out how I brought that scuffed lamp cap to beautiful life..



Voila-lovely again!
I'm enjoying the work and it gives me lots of time to learn all these new finishing processes and materials and just enjoy working with my hands and just BEING. It's a nice little humble vocation that puts me in my element...workshop elf...I feel most comfortable in this line of work. And it also just makes me appreciate the quiet art of skill, process and doing. It's just a genuine and authentic thing to be  tucked away beautifying,  producing, creating...so far removed from the loud, curated bullshit, "Killin it bro" mindset of social media. No one needs an audience for their every move. I have found my zen in sandpaper, wood stains and pandemics. I have no idea what's happening in the uber competitive art scene and don't feel like I'm missing out at all.
I have intentions to do some art videos but they will be centered around process, meditative aspects of creating art and the like. I feel free, like I took the 2020 noose of " pointless expectations and chasing" from my
neck and stepped off the gallows stage.
I've rendered the idea of galleries from their luxury status to simple marketplaces to sell your wares. It's just another table to sell your wares at the street fair, stop pretending it's anything more than that. Ooh la la. Internet is where it's at and I've had better luck selling everything myself. Everything has been taken off its pedestal and become very simple to me. Thank you mindfulness and meditation ☺️
So now it's time to paint and just be... And that's all it's ever needed to be all along. Sometimes you get the blessing of waking up from the illusion in time to appreciate it.

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