The colors, the sads, the therapy...

I'm making a conscious effort to NOT be on social media too much this week. For one I'm busy...for two Im sad... and I can endlessly blog my feelings and I don't really want to right now.
I lost a friend. One I knew from the start I would lose because I've only known her with metastatic cancer. So I've had the whole of our friendship to pontificate and prepare for her absence...but damn if it doesn't still hurt.
I took her on as a friend fully knowing she was on the downward staircase and would be out the door to an afterlife party.... but I still took her on as a friend- because I would want the same at a time when I would really need friends. I never think it can't happen to me. I just think "that's not my situation today". But I don't want to blog all this right now- I want to blog about life and art and am glad I have painting as my therapy through such things.
Now that DJ gig is over its time to burrow deep into my studio and make things happen. Yesterday was a full day- got a design project turned in to work then did some digital work that I could use for the Fair...THEN it was paint time and boy did I paint!

I took on the task of switching up the color palette and doing an aerial view of cactus. This made them kinda look like underwater plants, sea urchins, weird coral...which I love. Happy with it but it took forever doing all the textures, wisps, dots, pricklies...time consuming. It made me realize I need to charge more for this size...these aren't the loosy goosey abstracts I started with-they're more involved.

It's satisfying to see them all up on the wall together. The Design District pop up is Sept 19th so Id like to have many tabletop sized pieces to display and sell. Then it's on to State Fair time- the big daddy of selling events. This whole whirlwind is kicking my butt in a good way- Im having to get real prolific and focused REAL FAST.

So... super busy putting my feelings into colors and tough little cacti that weather the tough terrain. I think I need some birds in my arsenal and other things but that's a post for another day.

Stay gold, I'm gonna go paint❤

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The Shift

Im not sure what the pivotal moment was that I made "the shift", but it happened. It was a long time coming and long overdue. I began realizing the way I "talked to myself"...not in the crazy person sense (actually talking to yourself is pretty normal 😂) ...but in the way I downgraded my abilities and worth. Always to please others and stay in good graces even though it hurt me financially and emotionally. I would say "yes" to the cheapest price, "yes" to the work even though it really didn't serve me but would stress me out and overwhelm me. When my inner voice protested I told it to shut up- that at all costs we must bend over backwards for everyone.
I soon found myself in a joyless cycle of work that barely paid, handing over paintings I barely laid eyes on and sliding the money directly over to my landlord without even seeing it or enjoying it. Autopilot. Nothing nice for me. Out of soap and shampoo? Oh well. Luxury items. Glad to pay …

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"Calyces Primavera" mixed media on 30" x 30" gallery wrapped canvas

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Sorry, real talk. I want to do the ARTIST thing but it's also stabbing time and very hard for me.
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So rough week for me as I go through physical body stuff b…

Reclaiming your path

Reclaiming your path
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Since reading up on hormone balancing and adding DIM and natural progesterone cream into my regiment I've actually been seeing the scale go DOWN as opposed to nowhere. Endometriosis and the birth control pills I have to take continuously to keep my body shut off wreak havoc in other ways and its a painful tradeoff but a necessary one.
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Art Plunge

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