Waiting for ships that never come in

This seems to be a constant in my life. Except replace "waiting" with "working". Working for ships that never come in.
Now would be a good time for me to take a break from social media where I feel Im inundated with ads for "webinars for small businesses", "masterclasses" for this or that and a growing skepticism it's all just an email grab in the long run.
I distinctly remember quitting my job so my business could be PAINTING....now I find myself doing more social media marketing research than anything else. HALT! Stop the presses! I have $160 in my bank account. Really. One bill coming in right now could tank me. And despite all my work on my shop, hustling social media, etc...I made about $30 yesterday from one customer who also happens to be family.
My story is not very different from most artists though. So I keep my pity party to myself (and I am definitely crying behind closed doors) and brave on through another day.
The thought occurred to me -as it has many times- that maybe wrapping up my current calendar of projects and "hanging it up for a bit" would be wise. Getting a "job" doing whatever brings the money back into my coffers and digging myself out of the deep grave I find myself in.
I've been here before...and I've been in deeper....but I am older now. More weary of the chasing after a nickel than I've ever been. My time is running out and I'm way behind the 8 ball.
I'm disenchanted guys.
I'm disenchanted.

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